banished_dame: ([text] Rose Freaking Tyler)
Every once and a while it makes her laugh. She'd sat there on that bench and what was the one thing she'd focused on? His hair.

Really it was great... is great, really great.

It was the kind of hair that no matter what era they'd been in no one seemed to notice that he used a bit too much product... well not that everywhere they went even knew that. Still, it wasn't exactly a style that crossed dimensional style divides. Before... maybe before it'd been easier. But then he got that hair, and she couldn't help but want to thread her fingers into it. She'd hug him, probably too many times, but her hands always found their way to the nape of his neck. Her fingers would push up into it just a bit, the softer shorter hairs against the back of his head always felt good between her fingers.

Maybe it's laughable for a reason. All the things to make a mark on someone, the worlds he'd saved the adventures they'd been on... the way his eyes just let you know he understood exactly what you felt... those soulful deep brown eyes that looked into you not just at you, and she blabbered on about his hair.

Not that there wasn't any truth to it, it's really great hair.

Still she's back at the warehouse and the laughter just bubbles up from deep inside of her.

"Problem Mum?"

Her hand tucks her hair back behind her ear glancing to Captain Magambo, who's studying her a bit close. "No... no problem at all, just thinking back is all." Rose tries to shake it off, to think of something else but what sort of a woman who's trying to save the whole of creation opts to take a moment to reflect on a man she's not seen in years... in what feels like much longer... and pauses for his hair?
banished_dame: ([09] Shoulder to Lean)
"Come on Rose! Things to be seen!"

She could hear him near the door, and really when wasn't there something to be seen she wondered as she milled her way around the console. Her fingers traced lightly against the varied buttons and dials for a moment before she made her way up the walkway to wait at the door.

This was his favorite part she figured. Just the way his eyes lit up with that eager anticipation. The big broad grin of his as his arms folded over his chest, rocking a bit on his heels.

The TARDIS had stopped moving twelve minutes ago. She knew because she'd been hurtled from her bed and glanced at the clock to see what time it was meant to be, since traveling through time she'd realized meant that time wasn't exactly going to matter much. Her jet lag was bordering on impossible, but she loved it all.

"Well? So where are we?"

"Utopia."

She knew the word, actually knew the concept of it too. That whole perfect society and all hearts and flowers like the world was perfect. But she'd seen the world kind of... well end. Earth death and all that, so Utopia seemed sort of like a pipe dream. In fact most people considered it that even if she was right now just a door opening away from it all.

"Utopia? Seriously? Right beyond the doors is like... the perfect society? No war, no fighting, just... well perfectness?"

There was a moment where his smile faded and the confusion settled upon his brow. This was one of her favorite parts, because she loved shutting him up for a bit. It wasn't even that he talked too much, or that she'd ever get sick of hearing him. It was that he always had the answer. Even if it was only 'I'm a Time Lord that's why.' Still those few moments were always enjoyable.

He shook his head finally the grin returning to his features that she couldn't help but return herself. Her tongue pressed between teeth along the side of her mouth, feeling the rough spaces between as she waited for him to come up with the perfect answer to her question.

"No.. that's A Utopia."

"An? Shouldn't it be an Utopia... the whole vowel thing?" Her eyebrow raised in question at him, and he narrowed his gaze at her not amused at her pointed method of trying to distract him from answering her first question.

"A Utopian society's pretty near impossible. There's a few. Out there. Can't visit them though. Mess up the balance. It's so sensitive just 'bout anything could set it off. No this! This Rose is U'Topeiuah. Land of Cupcakes."

"Did you say... I mean maybe I'm wrong but that sounds pretty much like Utopia to me."

He grinned even wider at her, and she was pretty sure her stomach rumbled in anticipation. Then his arms uncrossed and he opened the door. The smell that wafted in quickly was warm and sugary with a bit of cinnamon and a hint of lemon that made Rose's eyes shut as she inhaled deeply.

"Oh we're not leavin' here for a while."

"Figured as much!" The Doctor replied as his elbow bent aside him and offered it to Rose, "So... shall we?"

Rose grinned lacing her arm into his and inhaled once more letting that sweet scent flood her mind with the thoughts of whatever could possibly be waiting for her.

"Oh! Almost forgot! You can't eat any of it. I mean the smell? That's the people."

"The... people?" Rose's face fell at the thought, the mere torture that this would prove if she couldn't eat any of the wonderful things she was smelling. "You took me to the land of Cupcake PEOPLE?"

"Nah... just wanted to see what'd happen if I said that. Come on Rose, things to be smelled and eaten!"
banished_dame: ([emote] Rly?)
"I can't believe you said-"

"Well don't repeat it!"

"I wasn't goin' to but honestly. Really. What'd you think would happen?"

"Well..." It dragged out of his mouth like the word was meant to last a minute. A minute at the very least. There was no way he thought it would've resulted in anything different than the situation they were in right now.

Her eyebrows raised in doubt, and her glare met his with a bit of a wide eyed stare of disbelief, "Well what?"

"What?"

Shaking her head she shut her eyes and took in a breath. It was supposed to calm her. It would've calmed her if she hadn't nearly choked on the thick smell that hit her nostrils with that very intake of air.

"God... it's just horrid. It's like the inside of Mickey's old sneakers after sloshing through that swamp on Chevyylle," her nose wrinkled as she tried to not taste what she was smelling, but as the Doctor had pointed out on more than one occasion it was all connected up there, and that meant she was feeling that taste at the back of her throat. Her tongue scraped against the roof of her mouth and her expression made the Doctor nearly laugh.

"Don't laugh. This is your fault. You and that mouth a'yours." Her mouth drew into a tight line as she narrowed her gaze at him.

"Oh... I don't know. Mean this isn't that bad. Well except the smell. Well the smell and that ticking. You do hear the ticking right? Cause otherwise I'd be wondering if it was in my head. Side effect of the smell."

"Yeah. I hear the ticking. I smell the smell and I heard you say it. So really why I'm in here? Still doesn't make sense."

"Guilt by association Rose! You're with me, and look at that they don't really mind that you didn't say it. You didn't stop me from saying it, and well then you're in trouble too. Rapscallion that you are Rose Tyler."

"Rapscallion? You made that up."

He shook his head and grinned at her. Of course the gate lifted and the guards came in. Rose shook her head again in disappointment at the Doctor. Really it was his fault they were in this mess. Always his fault. Well maybe that one time... two times, maybe three tops it was her fault.

"We did not realize... you are free to go."

"What?" Rose exclaimed as she looked at the Doctor. "How'd we go from arrested on sight, or rather on WORD, to free to go?"

"He speaks the native tongue. Words that are paramount to our survival are regarded with the highest respect... and dishonor as well. He spoke of Rapscallion. Highest Priestess of our Lands. She allows her name to be spoken simply to beg the forgive those that have sinned upon us. No one knows her name from public knowledge. Only those that have visited with her are granted that right."

"Serious?"

"I do not understand what you are asking, but you are free to go."

Shaking her head she glanced to the Doctor who was beaming, "See? What'd I tell you. Easy as anything, and I didn't even have to break out the big words!"
banished_dame: ([tardis] yeah impressive sure)
There's nothing quite like the feeling of the TARDIS lurching at an unexpected rate to the left. Maybe it was more to the right... but it was enough to force Rose from her bed. Not voluntarily either. If she thought about it enough, maybe it could've been a math equation. Then again she never was good at things relating to school. Still there was a certain [TARDIS + Rose sleeping soundly = Disaster] formula at work here for sure.

Rubbing her head, since clearly it had been smart enough to hit the corner of her nightstand on the way to the floor Rose got up to her feet and glanced at the clock. Three in the morning London, her time... and well... time wasn't exactly relevant. Still felt good to at least keep up some what of an appearance for it all. Grabbing the pillow off her bed and clutching it to her chest she took hold of the blanket as well. Shaking her head and still slightly rubbing at the knot that wasn't even there yet she padded through the winding halls of the TARDIS until she found him.

Of course.

Scurrying about the console room, flipping levers and handles and twisting dials and knobs.

Of course.

Sighing rather loudly she finally caught his eye.

"Rose!"

His volume was matched by his enthusiasm. His enthusiasm was never matched by anyone else, which was probably why she let him get away with it so early.

"Itsearly." Rose protested, very nearly all in one breath.

"What's that? Oh come on... Rose! We're headed to Galapagos!"

Again Rose hadn't been good in school, but the word sounded familiar, "The islands?"

"What? Oh. Well that would've been..." She's almost more fascinated by the sudden change of gears in his head than what he's actually saying as she leans against the rail a bit. "No! The Galapagos. Moons really. Well, Moon singular but it's broken up into pieces over the ages... now it's gone from Galapago.. to Galapagos."

His fingers scratch at the back of his head, and Rose too lets her fingers press to the back of her head, nearly out of reaction to his actions. Sliding down she rests against the grates of the floor of her, pressing elbows into her pillow as her hand supports her head. "So what's on the Galapagos Moon that got broken."

"Oh... can't tell you that! It'd ruin the surprise."

"Not even tell me since your steering sort of tossed me from bed?"

"It did? Oh."

It's as if he just noticed she's in the cotton boxers and over sized t-shirt, as if he hadn't even thought to look to what she was wearing until that moment. Then it was too late not to notice. She tugged the blanket against her knees a bit, fully aware that she could feel the backs of her heels very clearly against skin. Still she met his eyes, "Hit my head too."

Watching his brow furrow up with concern for a moment she smiled softly, "S'alright, heads taken a few bumps n'bruises now an'again. one more won't hurt. So broken moons."

"Right! Broken moons, and fantastic-"

She almost had him. Almost had pushed him out of that comfortable spot he so loved to wander through aimlessly. Keeping things to himself, and not letting her in. His head tilted and a very nearly warning look came across his features.

"Won't fool me Rose Tyler! I've seen the Galapagos, but not with these eyes and never with you. We'll share in the sight of it. Oh.. you'll love it. Don't you worry."

"Never am," she replied honestly as she placed the pillow atop her knees to rest her head there and watch him steer the TARDIS the rest of the way to the moon and maybe back.
banished_dame: ([emote] Last Broadcast)
Things like this happen.

Things like this occur a hundred times a minute... a thousand times an hour... all across worlds and planets and realms that only need a letter and a name to warn you off.

Things like this go on and no one notices, or maybe no one cares.

Turn a blind eye.

Look away when no one is watching.

Leave someone behind.

It happens though, every breath of every life, of every beat of a still beating heart... it happens.

Someone notices though. She's sure someone notices... someone knows too. A thousand points of light and all of them merge into a slipstream of nearly nothing... but it's something to someone... at some point.

So it happens.

Again and again.

Again and again.

Over and over to a thousand different worlds, a million different ways, over an infinite amount of seconds.

It happened again.

Just today.

Today for them.

A lifetime away for her.

So she slips in unknown, because no one is looking.

No one notices.

She's just another girl.

Just an ordinary girl.

And she's come to look at a city that just watched a kilo of their sadness walk away. A kilo of something that at some point in time made them feel whole... made them feel less empty and hollow. A kilo that sure once lost makes them wonder how vain they were to care about one kilo like that.

Still they're all watching.

Nothing to see.

Move along now.

Nothing to see... because it's over now.

But it happened.

Someone came.

Someone stopped it from taking them all.

Someone noticed.

Just no one noticed her.

Just a girl.

Just another blonde girl in the crowd watching what happens in the aftermath of something quite like this.

No one notices that she's different.

Changed.

No one notices that she's gone.

But she was never really there anyway.
banished_dame: ([doomsday] Don't Leave Me Behind)
It's a swirling vortex behind her. Pulling all of them into the void. A howling wind of nothingness that pulls with everything it doesn't have in it, hoping to fill it with something... with anything. It's the sounds of metal rushing past her, whipping her hair across her cheek, and into her mouth. It's the flap of the fabric of her jeans tugging hard against her hips as it tries to take her with. It's the grind of metal still firmly in place with magnets that the world really isn't quite ready for just yet. It's the cries of a thousand Daleks knowing their fate is something they'll never escape.

It's deafening... the sound of the end.

***


When it's done... when the roar has quieted down to nothing, and the wind that pulled at her with such determination no longer wants her... the silence cuts through her. It's a silence that feels as flat and vacant as the wall she's forced to stare at.

It's the nothing... and the very lack of sound makes it seem like none of it is real. Real was the forceful winds that blocked out everything except the sound of her heart racing at a rate so fast it threatened to push her pulse to dangerous levels. Real was the sound of metal clacking loudly against metal as the Daleks clattered against each other on their way out of this world and into the void.

Instead she's forced to listen to the truth.

It's cold and it's hollow and it sounds like sadness.

It's deafening... the lack of sound at the beginning.
banished_dame: ([doomsday] 10 - Without You)
- It's almost funny the way one moment he's there... seated in a chair smug smile on his face talking about whatever it is he was talking about and then the next gone. It's not even that she figured he'd just leave them, but he did seem to be a bit of flash and smile, and even now she knows watching the Doctor standing on crates trying to vibrate concrete with a frequency that she doesn't need 'scans for alien technology' to be impressed. Her hands skim against the bars of the wheels to the chair she's in, turning them slightly, just to rock herself forward and then backward. Watching him... try to avoid talking about Jack. If she didn't know better she'd almost think he was jealous. Her own smile a bit coy trying to allude to something with him that maybe he'd never even considered, but still trails at the edge of her thoughts from time to time, "The world doesn't end if the Doctor dances."

- The odds are stacked in an insane way against them and she's still trying to make sure she can help. Jack is off taking down as many Daleks as he can, the crackle of static comes before the cries of him taking out a few more before relaying to Lynda (with a Y) that he's holding them back as best he can. The Doctor is trying to figure things out faster, faster than his normal extremely fast methods and she knows it doesn't feel fast enough. When he tells her to get into the TARDIS she does, because she trusts him. She wants to help, wants to make sure that this is just another adventure for them... but when the doors close... and the message plays and she's fighting with every emotion she has in her, "I won't let you."

- The sound of chain link going from slack to taut puts a heavy metal clink of sound into her ears. She wants it to be more solid, something she can feel. Something she can trust in... something as strong and as sure as his hand each time it takes hers into it. All she has to do is tell the TARDIS to take her back. That she belongs with him. Months of travel, the TARDIS should know... it should feel that she belongs just as much as he does. The chain is pulling so hard against her that she knows this has to work, that the lurch of the truck should be enough to let her in... to open her up... and when it finally gives. When the chain goes slack and the doors fly shut...

- It's as bright as the burning of the Earth and even though she wants to look away. She wants to shield her eyes from the brilliant light, but she can't even turn her gaze. It's pulled her in and it feels safe. The breath she takes in is sudden and the light floods into her through her mouth, her nose and into the very heart of her. The connection is there. Strong as the chain that pulled her chasis open exposing her heart. Steady as the hand of the Doctor that has guided them both. They are one, and she knows... she knows just what that means.

- "I bring life."

- Waking up from the haze she's wondered just how they managed to pull it all off again. It's not every day that these things happen... not to her at least. Something is wrong though and it starts to furrow her brow watching him. Whatever is happening all she knows is that it can't be fair. That you can't save an entire world, travel back to one person just to watch them fade... it can't happen like that. Still he's talking about leaving and seeing her again, and all she can think to say is the words she can't figure out into anything she wants to say. All she can do is try to fight it once more, "Don't say that!"

- She watches cowering from an edge of the walls of the TARDIS. Trying not to seem afraid of what's going on. To trust him, because she ... because she trusts him. But then he's not him anymore, and the voice and the look don't match the man she'd been traveling with all that time. It's not what she wanted... not what she needed... "Can you change back?"

- It's wrong. Everything is wrong. Trying to hide from the Christmas tree, trying to make her mum safe and Mickey is trying to help too, but it's not supposed to be like this. He's supposed to be there for her. He's not supposed to leave her behind to fight this fight alone. She wants to be angry at him. To ball her hands into fists and punch him because she's so angry at him for saying he'd be there and then leaving. But she bottles it up along with the hurt and the loneliness and pulls in a breath saying the truest words she can think of, "Help me, Doctor!"

- It's not the same as it was. It's new. New adventures. New man. New times to go toward, and maybe it's not such a bad thing. He still remembers her... still knows who she is and how to make her smile. He's there... somewhere in there and maybe she can be okay with this 'new new self' of his. That it's brand new to him with those eyes that still sparkle when he smiles, that still shine when he knows he's about to solve it all with a swooping in gesture. It's still him... "So, where we gonna go first?"

- He's taken her so many places, and it'll take her so much longer for her to even be able to tell him how she feels for him... but there isn't that time left. All she has is now. Now and right here when he's not even there with her. She watched him fade into a new man and never got the chance to tell him... and she doesn't want the chance to fade again on her. He's not even there... not really, and even though she's struggling to memorize him just as he stands before her. To let that image of him be pressed into her memory just like fallen leaves are pressed into a book. As her tears fill her eyes she's watching that image of him blur a bit and she can't help it because she can't not say the words, "I love you."
banished_dame: ([emote] You Can't Be Serious)
Did I ever tell you about the time The Doctor took me to meet Jim Henson? See he's a big Muppets fan, and really I just wanted to see Kermit and maybe give him a hug. Could've been a real nice time. But see it never works out right. TARDIS must have an aversion to Henson or something, cause 1979 never worked quite right either.

So we land and I'm thinking it'll be brill, and we'll see the whole production house or something. Maybe even see him come up with like The Swedish Chef yeah? The door swing open and there's a field. Which I mean sure it's overshot before, not a big deal really. Still the field is pretty flat, and flat usually doesn't exactly mean there's much to hide what else is around. 'Cept there's also a desert off too. Just a weird bit of landscape cause over on the other side is a forest with like maybe a half dozen trees.

It's weird. I'm already thinking it's not time to meet Kermit the Frog.

The Doctor? He's mostly just scratching his head yeah? Making this sort of screwed up face looking up at the sky like he missed a turn somewhere. Like if maybe he just looked hard enough he just might see that left he should'a taken or something.

Anyway that's when I heard it. This monotonous tone just sort of like a driving beat of some sort. It was going 'badger badger badger badger' and really it's not every day you hear that word. Well unless you work at a zoo or you raise them? Who raises badgers anyway?

So it's repeating at me and I'm sort of not thrilled to be looking around neither, but I do it anyway. It's like the field just popped up with like dozens of these badgers! They're standing up on two legs sort of bouncing and saying Badger Badger Badger over and over!

Right so the badgers are there, and the Doctor is sort of looking at them like he hasn't a clue what's going on. Which I'm pretty sure he didn't. It would've been weird enough just with the 'badger badger badger badger' but then from the other side of me I swear the mushroom that was sort of unnaturally large said something.

I mean it. The mushroom said 'mushroom mushroom' which I swear happened. I mean why would I make this up? Trust me you see a Slitheen fit into a skin suit of an obese woman you realize nothing you make up is going to sound weird at all. So when I hear the badger again I realize they all must have this teleportation thing cause it's empty field then they just start popping up, but before I even know what to think that mushroom is all calling again.

It does that like three times and then all of a sudden it's like it changes and they're all going 'snake a snake oh it's a snake' but I mean all I see is the damn badgers. Who again have vanished along with the mushroom.

I look to the Doctor and he's pretty much bobbing his head along, like he's got it stuck in his head. I'm sort of wondering where the snake is so I head toward the desert. I mean the rest of it's all flat anyway. By then it's back to the badger parade with special guest of the mushroom.

Course when the snake part comes I'm ready and sure enough. There it is. And then there it goes. It's like all the creatures have the teleportation thing and we're just sort of stuck in this infinite loop of them repeating over and over again.

Right so I look to the Doctor and I go, "So how'd we end up here? I mean this isn't exactly Muppets and Harry Monster givin' me a hug yeah?"

He looks at me right, and he goes, "Not sure really... maybe I'll call someone up on my Banana Phone! Boop-boo-ba-doo-ba-doop! Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring banana phone Cellular, modular, interactivodular!"

That's about time when I headed back to the TARDIS and waited for him to come back and take us out of there.

Still haven't met Jim Henson though. Met John Hanson. Not the same at all. First President of Congress... yeah... impressive. Does he have a Grover Muppet?

banished_dame: ([emote] Bored Whatever)
"No... what's it do?"

"It doesn't *do* anything Rose, you drink it and then... oh... well yes I could see why you'd phrase it like that, but really the effects of it aren't too bad. Well... too bad being of course based on the sliding scale of the Tourmalynx War of the... oh remember that? That was good."

"Yeah, real good 'til you up and asked him if he was going to be using all of that or not, and he looked at you like you were gonna-"

"I know! But I wouldn't have... really... okay maybe, but just for a minute."

"Doctor? What's the effect?"

"Right! Effect. Says... well this says nothing. It's got a little picture of a what is that? a Skull? Oh that can't be good."

"A what? It can't be a skull. Who would make a potion that was this pretty pink color and make it label with a skull. Lemme have a look."

Rose took the bottle out of the Doctor's hands and turned it around for a bit. He was already wandering about the place, scanning the makeshift lab, the whole thing really was just a bit too far fetched for her. Wandering about was one thing, pushing buttons and making little comments sure, but he pulled that lever and then it was a roller coaster ride of sorts. Zipping around through something that reminded her a bit of a movie, but she couldn't place it in her head. Then they landed and ended up in this lab.

The lab where the Doctor had been milling about in until he found the cabinet. Which of course he opened, and of course started to flip through all the bottles. There were rows of them all with tiny labels on them, and clearly she wasn't just going to try any of them. So she was looking and asking mostly. He was the Doctor he should know these things.

Of course he didn't, and he was licking something... oh God... that's just horrible. Apparently tasted that way too from the grimace on his face. Rose's nails were picking absently at the label when she heard it tear a bit.

"Oh," she breathed out softly hoping that she hadn't done anything wrong but then she glanced down to the bottle, "Oh! Look it's not a skull! It's a..."

"Llama."

"Why'd anyone have a llama potion? Who wants to be a llama? Who wants to turn someone into a Llama? Oh! It's like..."

Rose turned around slowly and shook her head, "You know I thought I'd seen a lot of weird things, but Doctor? This is a Disney movie yeah? I mean... this is Yzma's lab! She made that King into a Llama! That's what... no. That can't be this! That's was a cartoon and this I swear isn't a cartoon."

"Yzma... Yzma... OH! Eartha Kitt, turned into a... Cat Yes! Very clever. But no. This isn't the cartoon, perhaps some odd coincidence, or you could consider that maybe those Disney folks have an Orb of Zaxxion. Seeing other worlds? Could explain the talking mice."

"Yeah... whatever. Look I'm not turnin' into a llama, we just need to get out of here."

"About that? You remember... in the movie I mean... how they exactly did that?"
banished_dame: ([emote] Crop - Windblown Doubt)
If she could only see angels above her and fears on the floor.
And she needs to discover she wants more and more and more.


The church wasn't like she remembered it, but it was still the same church, still the same building, and still the same odd musty smell that she figured came from the books. The bibles with well worn pages, being flipped and thumbed through with dry skin and wetted fingertips just to get a better grip on the thin velum that the ink was stained to. She knew they weren't meant to be there. Yet again it was one more trip that never was meant to go the way it had. But things had gone back, so really the trip on some level probably never even existed, except for the memory she had of it all... and the story she remembered growing up.

The story was what made her realize that she was exactly where she was supposed to be. In that exact moment, doing that exact thing. It wasn't fate, or destiny it was just what was meant to be. She was meant to watch him, to have that final look into his eyes as he left her... left her once more.

It was a bit like visiting the spot where someone famous had died. Walking around waiting for the guided tour, trying to see if there's a shop to buy some collectible spoon for her mum, or just a postcard to let someone know that they wished they could've been there too.

"Rose!"

"Yeah... comin' just a'bit," her voice carried away from her, echoing in the ceilings back down to her until she could almost feel it surround her. It was funny how a building could have such life to it, and yet all at the same time feel so dead.

He was standing there... right on the spot. Two white Converse All-Stars laced up tight and his glasses on with that furrowed brow expression pacing around. All she could do was stare at the ground though. That spot on the pavement where everything stopped... where she'd saved him once, and then the world unraveled from that very spot. Like a spinning top just going around and around, like the car on the infinite loop. Until it finally settled onto it's side skittering away from it all.

"Here? Rose..."

"Hmmm?" His touch to her arm brought her line of sight back to his, and she could see that he wasn't trying to rush her... just try to figure it out. Her hand went to her hair, threading through fingers until it felt a bit tight at the back of her head, "Yeah... right there. I mean you were here too... kinda."

The Doctor leaned down and did one thing that Rose would never quite get used to him doing as he licked the pavement.

"Oh... really, you ought'a figure out a different way of doin' that... really..." Rose knew the situation wouldn't present itself but now... even if it had she'd never even dream of it now that his tongue had been on the pavement.

Taking her hand out of her hair she shoved them into her jacket pockets, feeling a chill around her for the moment as her head tipped up to the sky. It was surreal to her to think that she'd been there before, watching him go from right at her feet, right where she could've saved him... to somewhere else.

If she could believe in heaven after everything she'd seen... all the horrible things in the universe that shouldn't be really happening, at least not that a God she knew about would allow... but maybe it's all for a reason. Maybe because things are already happening a thousand times a single second, that it's all going to be fine.

"Figure it out?"

The Doctor stood up, resting his hand to her shoulder in comfort mostly, but also to steady himself as he put away the Sonic screwdriver into his jacket pocket, "Just an echo... the event repeated so many times it ended up with a wave... like a ripple and it'll fade out eventually. Come on... other things to find, adventures to have."

His hand was there... she knew it was there, reaching out to pull her back, to bring her into the world that she wanted to be in. Because the world that everyone else had to live in... felt like an echo to her now, and eventually she knew it'd fade out too.
banished_dame: ([09] Shoulder to Lean)
"Right then. Here we are, Nfbdfrzxyw-land."

Rose quirked up an eyebrow at the Doctor, "The what? Sorry but how'd you even spell that?"

"No vowels?"

"Yeah... figured that," Rose replied with a smirk as she shook her head a bit and leaned on the rails in front of the door to the TARDIS. "So what's in... Neh-FebDef-Er-Zuw-ix-yuh-wuh Land?"

The Doctor tilted his head and grinned, "No, it's Nfbdfrzxyw, but it's alright, not many get it right the first time. This is the Land of The Sensias. Which is their fancy way of sayin' that they like givin' all your senses a bit of a work out. Most notably known for the Bunker of Baking. Beautiful thing the Bunker of Baking, just smells like a pastry shop times a hundred."

Rose took in a deep breath just thinking about that sort of a room.

"We're not there yet Rose."

"Oh I know, just gettin' my lungs used to those deep breaths. Mum had a mail order job once, sellin' fancy candles. Lit a whole mess of them one day when she realized she'd never sell them all. Place smelled like Gingerbread and Vanilla and Pine. The Pine sort of messed with the rest, but she thought it was Pineapple so I guess it was just a mistake. Still smelled good for a bit."

"Oh this'll smell fantastic and no odd tree scents stuffed in there either. Just go on Rose... through those doors. Should be right set to be in the middle of the Bunker."

Rose shifted her shoulders up in anticipation as she placed her hands on the door to the TARDIS pushing them open prepping her lungs for that first whiff of what she would only assume would be fantastic and yummy all at once, but instead there came a deafening roar or sound that was so loud Rose pushed her hands to her ears letting the TARDIS door swing wide open away from her.

She could see the Doctor's mouth moving but she couldn't hear a thing coming from him, even if she had her ears uncovered she was pretty sure she wouldn't make out a thing.

"WHAT??" Rose had shouted the word at him her features trying to concentrate on the shapes of the words, instead of letting her ears struggle for the sound of letters, but still she just saw movement, "WHAT???"

Finally the Doctor shook his head and brushed past her standing there with the sound flooding into the TARDIS, where he finally shut the doors and all Rose could hear now was a high pitched ringing sound.

"Srffy... gong corduroys...vat fuzzuh Zallif Astound."

Rose shook her head really unsure what he'd said now that actual words were making sounds, and she blamed the ringing in her head that seemed to be rattling around a bit too much.

"WHAT?" She still yelled, still feeling as if she'd been at a rock concert for four hours and now had that feeling like she had to talk above the sound in her head.

The Doctor took her hand and led her toward the console, dragging the monitor around and typing into it the phrase - Sorry Wrong Coordinates. That was the Wall of Sound.

"OH. THE WALL OF SOUND? NOT REALLY THE BUNKER OF BAKING?"

The Doctor smiled at her and shook his head, probably glad his own hearing didn't really mind all the noise, automatically adjusting to silence and loudness all the same. It wasn't a mystery really, of course how they'd ended up at the Wall instead of the Bunker was something else entirely, but Rose just pressed her finger to her ear trying to shake the ringing from her head while the Doctor spun the small wheel along the console and shouted something about Letter Duck something, and off they were again.
banished_dame: ([emote] Starlit Apologies)


Dance into the fire that fatal kiss is all we need
Dance into the fire when all we see is the view to a kill



The moment she's done it she knows it might possibly be the biggest mistake of her life. Still she lets it happen. Overtake her. Overwhelm her. All the smallest particles bonding to every fiber of her being, and even then it goes that small bit further. Like gold strands that wind up, and surround all her nerve endings until all she feels is everything, and all she knows is too much for her own mind to contain it all.

The TARDIS has shared travels, and the Doctor with her... and now Rose knows it's not a matter of sharing, this is something quite different than sharing. This is a repossession of sorts. It's the TARDIS reclaiming something that perhaps it knows it needs in this moment. So it takes her back. Back to all the moments in time when she knows that the mark is needed. It's path is known, already seeing all the triggers before, the letters calling out to her forever and ever.

Bad Wolf.

It's her. It's always been her, and now... now more than ever she knows just how Bad this all is. Still she lets it pass. In a sense she feels it's already come to pass. That the time has already happened just a few moments from the one she's feeling now. All the moments are stacking up on her and it's almost too much but she knows that she can't just stop now.

She's the Bad Wolf.

The TARDIS travels with her now, and takes her to the place she knows she must be. The place that has been a pathway leading up to this very moment for her entire life. All the signs... all the small steps she's taken and all she can see now...

Is everything.

She feels it too. Swirling around her, like sparks across her skin and pins pressing lightly against nerve endings. It's always moving, always continuing and the moment she knows she's in right now... she can feel it being over already too soon.

She's the Bad Wolf and she's going to die. It's there... out there in a moment that's yet to pass, but has already happened. All she sees is the death. All she knows is how much it all hurts... to feel it all at once. Every last person, every last emotion all of it all at once, and she knows... how lonely it must be. To feel everyone and never be with any of them.

She brings death.

She is the Bad Wolf.

She brings life.

She is the Bad Wolf... and she's going to die.

He sees it all too. So many things, and for so long... and he can see it too. He knows what's coming and he can't let her do this.

So he takes it back. He holds her in his arms and he draws it all out of her, because he knows what he feels every day of every single moment, and he knows.

He knows she's the Bad Wolf, and he isn't going to let her die.

Not today. Not if he can help it.

Because she's Rose, and she deserves to be Rose until her true ending comes.
banished_dame: ([10] text - Come with Me)
Her fingernails tapped against her teeth as she hesitated to ask if there was even a plan. She knew, really she always knew that the plan was that there was no plan, and if there had been even the thought of a plan it'd be changed before it even started, so mostly it was pointless to even plan. Still with her back pressed against the wall and her knees drawn up against her chest she felt a sigh coming on and didn't want it to escape her lips. Of course then the walls shifted again and the cranking sound behind her started again. The low vibration of metal grinding against metal felt in her spine down to her toes as she was scooted along with the wall.

The Doctor though was up onto his feet again, pressing his cheek to the wall, using the Sonic Screwdriver where he thought might trigger something. He worked at a maddening pace, shifting about the wall as it moved toward him. Feet taking those tiny steps back along with the wall, almost tripping himself up in the process. Rose just stayed put, knowing that by the end of it the denim pockets of her jeans would be more than just dusty and dirty, but well worn in spots where the seams overlapped, and frayed at the edge where her pocket kept folding over and back right again.

In Trouble Again. )
banished_dame: ([folks] Standing in the middle)
Peter Alan Tyler was a great man. Head full of ideas, and a heart as big as humanly possible... maybe even then some. I grew up thinking I'd never know him, not truly know him aside from the stories Mum told me. Besides it wasn't like he was there right in front of me growing up either. All the little things that could have triggered stories or questions, got boxed up long before I ever would've known to ask about them. Trophies and pictures all shut up in boxes collecting dust and just building up that curiosity in my head to think... just who was my dad?

He died when I was just a baby, and all I ever had was the stories from when I was little. Growing up you probably think that it's enough, just to know that he loved your Mum and he would've loved you just as much.

But for me it was a fact. I know with everything in my existence that Pete Tyler loved his wife and he loved his daughter. I know it because I met him. I was there with him the day he died and I held his hand when those few precious moments slipped by and he just wasn't there anymore. I know it because when he knew, when he really knew who I was... it was there in his eyes.

When you lose a father it's never easy. That loss is something you try to sort out in your life until it makes some sort of sense. Course it never will, cause taking away someone before it's their time... that'll never make sense to someone.

But I didn't just lose him. I watched it. I stood on the side of the road and watched it happen. I stood there and watched myself watch it about to happen and I stopped it. I made the one mistake you're never supposed to make and I saved him.

I saved him only to have to let him go... I saved him only to lose him all over again. But it wasn't a loss that was so unknown to me, because I know Peter Alan Tyler, and I know that when Mum says I get my mad ideas from him that they're not all so mad. That I get my bravery from him, and yeah bit of that stubborn comes from him too.

Thing of it is, that even though I lost him so many times... finding him again? No matter how many times he smiles at me from across the table in the morning, or I see him come up and hug Mum...

I still think about holding his hand in that street... and I still know just what I lost on that day.
banished_dame: ([emote] Yeah Right)
"Murder of crows... how awfully dreadful," Rose comments as she wanders along the street. Head tipped up and jaw slightly agape staring at all of them just perched on the wires.

"Oh... Rose Neopagans thought they were Psychic! Or go by the European legends that they are the Carriers of Death and Doom... but really they're just protectors!"

"Of what? They're... quite ominous looking, sort of give me the chills a bit." Rose is trying not to notice how many of them there are, because the numbers are increasing by the minute, but The Doctor doesn't even seem to notice. He's still going on about some signal or noise pattern he picked up. The noise that brought them to this time and this place, and Rose is utterly convinced that they know. She's starting to subscribe to that NeoPagan belief a bit because it's like they know that they don't belong here, but he's just rushing ahead of her.

"It's not right... so many of them yeah?"

The Doctor pauses and turns to look at Rose, suddenly aware of just how startled the birds are making her. With a scratch at the back of his head for a moment he glances up to the phone wires along the street, "Oh... well that's beautiful!"

"Beautiful? They're crows! And they've been adding to their numbers since we started down this lane."

"Have they now?"

Rose stopped in her tracks, fists at her side as she glared at The Doctor, "Are you mad? You haven't been hearing them? They've been cawing up a bloody storm!"

"What?!"

"Oh... yeah you're real smart," chided Rose as she rolled her eyes a bit at him. He just grinned back at her trying to coax her the rest of the way. Shaking her head in a bit of dismay she picked up her step and met up with The Doctor keeping her stride close to his as he led them along the rest of the walk.

"So what is it then? This signal that you've picked up out here?"

"Ohhh, just this chatter. Chitter really. No... Chatter. Interesting bit of noise, with a slight.. ticking. I mean it's like a clicking. No... tapping?"

"Peckin' cause... well..." Rose glanced up ahead of them, not even noting that The Doctor had paused scratching his head while trying to sort out just what sort of noise he was hearing. Still rambling along Rose tugged on one trenchcoat sleeve, "Peckin' I'd say cause... of that."

"Ooooh... well now that is beautiful. A big beautiful Black Bird... and look at you! You're just tapping away at that aren't you!"

"You know what it is then?"

"Noooo... but it'll be fun trying to figure it out!"

"Yeah... just watch out for droppin's yeah?"
banished_dame: (Default)
She couldn't help but smile watching him race around the console turning dials and pulling on levers as if she hadn't seen him do it a thousand times before. All the while chattering on and on about where they were headed off to this time. After the last trip he promised Rose something a bit more classy, and it wasn't going to be a hard task considering the last place they were Rose ended up in a bog. Five showers later and she finally thought she'd gotten the smell out of her hair, but her nose still had a bit of sense memory to it.

"So how classy are we talkin' here? I mean I'm not going to have to go change right?"

The Doctor looked up from spinning one of the wheels the wrinkles in his forehead increasing as he nodded, "You better."

"You gonna at least tell me where we're going? I mean if I'm changing I should at least have some idea of the place yeah?" Rose pressed her tongue against the back of her teeth as she waited for his reply. He was watching something on a screen on the other side and she was pretty sure he hadn't heard her. "So I'll just go put on something... classy... and hope we don't end up in some barn for a hog calling contest an' me in heels and a gown." Her voice trailed off toward the end there but he was still all gears focused on the TARDIS and all the twists and turns he had to do just to get it exactly right.

The precision he was going to actually showed her that at least they wouldn't end up in the wrong place this time, or the wrong time either. Moving down the halls and around the bends toward the dressing room Rose tried to think of where they'd be off to. But her mind knew that whatever she thought up the Doctor would be going beyond expectations anyway.

She was pinning her hair up when the TARDIS came to an abrupt halt. "We're there yeah?" She called out already hearing the Doctor starting to chatter on about all the wonderful things they were going to do, "I can't actually hear you... not that it matters."

Rose wasn't much for getting dressed up but when she did the one thing she fancied was the sound of the heels clicking against the floors, and as she stood at the top of the stairs to rejoin the Doctor all she needed to see was that smile of approval from him. It was such a modest smile too, more a look of impressed than anything else.

"Now I'll have you know, it better not be a bog on the other side of that door now," she replied as her hand took hold of the side so she could move down the stairs and join the Doctor.

"Bog free, I promise. Rose, it's February twenty-fifth of the year nineteen ninety-five and you are about to witness the final performance in front of a select audience of Mr. Frank Sinatra."

Rose could tell he was excited about it, because the way his voice lilted up at the end there, and Rose was thrilled as well, "Serious? Frank Sinatra's final performance? Oh this is going to be fantastic! Think he'll sing Strangers in the Night," Rose tipped her head aside the few tendrils of hair she hadn't managed to pull up atop her head brushing against bare shoulders, as she smiled up at the Doctor, "Oh, I'd love to hear 'I'll Never Smile Again' or 'The Best is Yet to Come'."

"Why Rose Tyler, are you a Sinatra Fan?"

She couldn't help but smile, "Mum kept all of Dad's records from before... I used to listen to them for hours as a kid." Turning to face him just before he went to open the door Rose smiled, "We'll dance yeah? One dance to one song?" That was all she really needed, was one dance to one song, and she'd probably be floating on air.

"Of course," The Doctor replied as his hand pressed against the door of the TARDIS revealing the gorgeous setting at the Frank Sinatra Desert Classic golf tournament that had been held earlier in the evening. Rose linked her arm with The Doctor's and they made their way into the crowd to find their seats, and have their dance.

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Rose Tyler

October 2014

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